To Remember

I was just having a normal Tuesday.  Nothing special.  We have to give our students practice test questions every day. We have to review them, grade them, then record the percentage of correct answers on a spreadsheet.  We do this Every.Single.Day.  Three times a day, too, since we switch classes. Blah.  Anyways, I was calculating today's percentage in my last class- just kinda daydreaming as I did it. It only takes a minute. 

 

And it apparently takes less than that to sidesweep me into a state of sadness.  Utter, deep, deep, devastating sadness.  While I was calculating, a thought popped into my head, "I haven't talked to Dad in forever.  I need to call him when I get off."

 

UGGGHHHHH.  It broke my heart to remember.  I started crying, and by all means, I was trying my best to control it and not the let the tears fall down my face.  After all, I was in front of my sixth graders.  But I couldn't control it. Y'all, nothing is worse than that feeling.  Remembering, "Oh!  That's right!  I won't ever be able to call him and hear his voice again."  UGGGGHHH.  IT IS THE WORST.  I don't want to forget again because then I'll have to remember. 

 

I miss you, Dad.  I want to talk to you so  bad.  I love you.  With all my heart.